Tell Heather sorry for burning her hair. Also for anything else that I may have done that warrants and apology. Anything after about 10pm is kind of hazy.
Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
Theres a picture of me with cut up clothes rolling in the policeman's lawn, I missed you, summer.
I pretty much envision me eating a turkey leg whilst fucking you. I have priorities.
What can I say, I bounce back quick. Never thought the line "my turtle died" would get me so many free drinks last night
Laying on my kitchen floor and the lights just got brighter... I just died or there was a power surge. Based on the amount of booze I drink both are possible.
We had on the same team jersey so at the time it made sense to hook up.
Duh.
I want a burrito.
Truly, you are the voice of a generation.
I was a battlefield of empty bottles and bodies. We though we won, but the booze had the last laugh.
If you're staying here tonight, you need to promise me you won't make another bonfire in the lounge room. My girl is still pissed about that.
It was only funny because some guy across the street was getting his mail and he just stopped and watched me throw up everywhere
I love the fact that my Mom has been present at 90% of my drug deals.
Well my summer has already been productive. I partially caused a divorce.
My dad told me I would need to be my mom's DD tonight. So, that's how my Easter weekend is going down.
So after we found out he wasnt throwing up blood in was just hawaiian punch and we all failed breathalyzers the cop drove us around like a taxi and brought us back to the apartment
Randomize
