I'm already going to be stripping so like pretty much you would just be watching me. Also we're watching twilight. again.
just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
....ANDDD I just became confused during sexting and sent my mother a text describing a "porno-worthy cum shot."
I think we should see other people.
Already working on it.
Yeah i wasn't gonna go out but then i was like im not gonna get my dick wet stayin at home studying
Nothing says fuck you quite like putting your used condom in someones mailbox for them to find in the morning.
Hey bro u need to come home now, me and andy just had a 15 minute conversation about fig newtons. f this bong
I really super glued a paper bow tie to my body last night. I need to do less drugs.
Not complaining, but why is there a Russian chick downstairs making latkes?
"I wasn't planning on buying a chicken, but I bought it anyway." --some guy on the bus with a chicken
"Yeah, I only have nine toes." --that same guy
The condom broke. Its OK tho, turns out I was just humping her thigh for 20 minutes. Jager dude, Jager.
What happened with the girl wasn't a gay thing. It was just a mutual respect and want for sex. The guys just weren't there.
Call it what you want. You fucked a girl.
So right before she was about to give me head she tapped the tip and said "Is this thing on" I think I'm in love.
On a scale from 1-10 how fucked up would it be to buy weed with my fafsa money?
It's a study aid
The sex was so good we high-fived after.
Randomize
