Well apparently he's into motor boating.
Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
Just bought an airhorn. Bad things will happen.
You are the worst substitute drug dealer ever
im sorry for trying to flush a roll of toilet paper down with my puke. probably not great for your toilet
Remember my theory about how the universe perfectly unfolds to fuck me? Well, it's at work right now
I don't remember because I was drunk out of my mind, but I have it on good authority that weed cinnamon buns at 3 in the morning with chocolate milk are better than sex.
You know, you have a good excuse now if you have a poor performance. Just say "what do you expect? I took a paintball to the DICK!!"
just because the DWI class is located at the University does not make him a professor. I was duped, he is in no way, shape or form a professor!
I DON'T WANT TO KNOW THE SCIENTIFIC REASONING BEHIND WHY I STARTED A HAREM ESPECIALLY NOT FROM A GUY IN THE HAREM!
What the World Series means to me is that I've slept with too many giants fans.
Does being an adult mean drunkenly signing for your tax return from a foreign country? If so, I've reached adulthood.
Well I mean I HAD done a pretty good job of not pooping myself through the years
how soon in a friendship can you start calling them a motherfucker
I Never thought my late 30s would end up with me getting eaten out on a desk in the managers office of a lululemon, but I guess being a franchise owner has its perks!
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