No I remember falling down the stairs I just don't remember it hurting.
Medicore although I woke up with the business card of a Turkish lawyer called Mufasa...
he's my ex-boyfriend's best friend... he tried to make out with me to prevent me from hitting his friend. then they almost fought about it.
teach me your ways.
You were demanding water from a bottle but I didn't have one..so I just took the water bottle from the hamster cage. You're welcome.
I can't wait for paintbang. I'm going to throw a marker at a child. There will be bail money in my backpack in m trunk. Don't use it on beer.
I thought you just gave him blowjobs and he criticized your drug use.
I'm so sick
I would imagine. You did most of your drinking for brazil last night.
That and I think I got food poisoning from sharing nachos with that homeless guy..
Can you explain the plethora of sunflower seeds in the dryer?
I'm at a nursing home getting weed. Lol when times are tough, things tend to get a lil weird
I'm currently being signed up to be painted nude for a college art class. ah yes best high decision ever
As much as I enjoyed playing drunk half naked twister and talking about my daddy issues last time, I'll have to pass.
I'm 4,715,723% sure I don't give a fuck.
Hiking for a first date sounded like a good idea in theory because there was absolutely no possibility of me blacking out. In practice, I'd rather black out than go through what I just went through.
Masturbating with Lord of the Rings on was not how I planned my afternoon going but here I am.
Did you make it home alright?
No I'm sitting under a tree by a cricket. He's alone crying out for someone to Fuck him. This guy gets me.
Randomize
