How come it tastes like onions whenever I go down on her?
Halloween 2010: the NuvaRing girls. You're Thursday. We'll walk into the party chanting "Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday, Everydaaay".
best googles of the semester: toe fucking, purpose of two nostrils, human tail. with pictures
The stories of what you did in Cuba got home before you.
I'm about to tackle a 10 year old off a sea doo
He was pretty out of it. He heard crickets outside, and thought it was the laptop. So he put his ear to it, rubbed the keyboard, and said "tell me your secrets."
Between the plague n the counterfeit drugs we brought back from mexico I'm not thinking too highly of their country right now. Screw mexican homeless men.
Remember when we used to go to the bathroom to do drugs together? Now it's to help you with your spanx.
You both ran and jumped into the tub yelling Jamaican bobsled team
God I miss you. I want to fuck your face... Then do all the girly cuddly shit too.
Got cut off last night cuz this chick had her hands down my shorts and was blatantly playing with my dick while I was trying to order. apparently that's "frowned upon"
Well. At least he's a gentleman. A gentleman satanist.
I just did a walk of shame on my own block. one of the old neighbors saw and greeted me "good morning, girl next door"
There are condoms rolled onto each bunny ear of the ears I was wearing last night
His mom wants to come see the dorm.
Hide the whip.
Randomize
