Just washed my feet between classes in the bathroom...Four girls totally judged me...
I wish you would always start your sentences with "speaking of my clit..."
In the library. Still drunk. Shoes missnig. Term paper due in fiften minutes. Iff I puke u think theyll throw me out?
Chinatown. Her fortune cookie said "accept the next proposition you receive." TELL ME NO NOW.
just a question.. totally understand if you dont know what im talking about.. but.. do you have my funnel? i think i tucked it in to your bed last night.
it was pretty much a given that i would lose my thong on dollar tequilla shot night
He got arrested in front of the church last night. Looks like we need to find a new location for the wedding.
I literally just wrote "I'm sorry" in my blue book, got up and walked out
Can we promise no matter what that we have sex the night the Mayan calendar runs out?
You paid at the door and they gave you a straw for the kiddie pool full of booze.
After a bit there were two girls who got naked and liquor wrestled. I don't think it was planned.
I think he is probably a psycho that will eventually murder me but i mean the sex last time was AWESOME.
Hot Damn Cinnamon Schnapps make me feel like the sun is punching me in the face and a bear is sleeping inside me.
He didn't get laid that weekend.. and that is honestly an accomplishment for the rest of us.
he asked if he should bring the trash can into the room.. apparently i shoved my finger all over his face and said.. shhhh dont talk... just take your pants off.
Just so you know, I choose to answer your bootytext tonight because it was the most creative.
Randomize
