How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
My dad just yelled at me for going to youth group with out telling him. Apparently going out to fuck a girl without telling him gets me a high 5, going to youth group gets me grounded.
Tip for today: never try to fart and swallow at the same time. You'll end up choking on whatever you are currently swallowing and shit yourself from the freakout of choking.
is it sad that pink shorts and cowboy hats remind me of getting jizz in the hair?
I'm not to broken up about it. Our relationship was worse than a coldplay song.
god, a vagina is an amazing trump card
She just took the bottle of jager to the bathroom and locked the door. Now I hear the water running..if the house floods she's paying for it
Pretty sure God shed a tear when I put 15 singles in the collection plate.
during charades she pointed to herself and you guessed 'girl who wants to fuck me'
my make-up looks really good tonight. I swear it had nothing to do with me finishing all of your strawberry vodka.
It makes no sense at first, you go with it, it's fun and entertaining and then a disaster
I FOUND THE LEGS
I just did the math technically I'll be drunk until 2:30-3:00pm
Got so high i fell asleep kyaking...for 2 hours.
How did you get so drunk?
Alcohol.
Randomize
