how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
pretty sure I just motor boated my professor at the drag show
He's sitting on the floor holding his bracket and crying, literally crying... he just keeps saying "Kansas how could you?" over and over
My broken door handle makes it really inconvient for when i need to puke at red lights.
He had a cowboy hat I don't know where from and he was trying to lasso a snowman with a dog leash.
Why not. Its my b-day, you're in town, I'm in town, bars are in town, and alcohol is in town. I don't see anything not good about those things.
I will tell my future kids about the time I went to the bar with a stomach virus. Like a champ.
Call me old fashioned but i like to drunk dial a girl 2 or 3 times before sending a dick pic
I was talking to another guy at the bar last night and all of a sudden a flying piece of Sausage lands on my boobs. Then I hear my boyfriend yell, "just marking my territory."
I am making it a rule that only people I am comfortable around enough to not have to put a bra on are allowed for Sunday funday. I think that's a good rule for someone who started drinking alone at noon while everyone else here sipped their coffee.
Just had my very first high conversation with mom
And you survived it! I'd say that earns you a "Blaze It Like a Real Adult" from the Grown-up Girl Scouts
Shhhh less advice, more soothing words and dirty phrases
According to the arrest report, I shouted "no, YOU put some pants on" at the cop. Downhill from there.
Remember last NYE when after the 9th shot of tequila you went on full crazy mode and made out with the 50 y/o doorkeeper? and he called you the next day?
did the thing where I quickly swipe right to every girl on Tinder & matched with my sis. God I hope swiping carelessly is hereditary
Randomize
