it was beautiful and magic like when a hot girl grabs her own tits and smiles at you
No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
fter the third song from an iPod commercial played I realized how much that frat sucked.
I just added 'steal mom's xanax' to my to do list for when I go home for Easter.
i'm using salt from the free peanuts to stop the bleeding.
My fuck buddy is great and all, but it gets weird when she gets in arguments with her BF in the driveway
Someone wrote "gnarballz" on my fridge in black marker. I'm pissed, but more concerned I slept with the one who did it
Do you know why I woke up with a half peeled lemon in my purse with a post-it that said "eat me" on it?
And here I thought that was one nut sack too many
My Sexting was not on an AP level
He sent me a dick pic for every page I had to write for final papers (87) & brought me adderall. Tell me that isn't romance.
Yeah that stuff was rough. We insisted on wearing our bikinis all down college ave, and at several parties that were not beach themed
You wanna come over?
Too high to be booty called. My cereal is growing hair.
I said, hypothetically speaking, if I was going to be having some rough sex Friday night, when WOULD be the best time for a massage, mother dear?
just showered sitting down cuz standing seemed like too much work, thursdays need to stop making me their bitch.
Randomize
