I fink we're distracting them from bumping the proverbial uglies
I'm drive I can fine osifer
Like my Aunt Merial always says ... big dicks, big dicks.
there is this woman at the counter who looks identical to linda ellerbee. and she's grinning. COME. INSIDE. NOW.
Great date with Damon, but I'm not sure if telling him I like lesbian porn is a good second date discussion.
Thong +tight pants =hungry butt. Not a good look on big women! Walmart sucks.
i just found out that washing ur bong in the dishwasher works. its been a productive day
She spent a lot of time to get her cleavage to look that good. It would be rude not to stare. It shows you are paying attention. Chicks dig that.
You called me at 4am shouting drunk shit about Poland and asking me to 'come out and play.' Where the fuck were you?
Poland
As the cops are taking us away I see the strippers taking our DD backstage.
At the funeral we'll say nice things, like "She was delightfully extreme, psychotically wonderful, and could probably drink all you fuckers under the table."
That's literally the perfect eulogy
We should have a mid-burrito sex-break, too. Just so we don't get too full all at once
Good point.
You asked me if I ever met a talking rock and when I said no, you looked me dead in the eye and said today was my lucky day then you crawled into a ball and started talking...that high.
it's my fake id's birthday. i'm wearing a hat, and i have a beard. i'm untouchable. TO THE BARS!
If sleeping with your boss doesnt scream job security i dont know what does.
Randomize