she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
Do you how many people I've successfully loaded into a Mazda Miata? Six. Six people. How? Strategically.
Birthday Coupon: This text is good for alteast 3 hours of Birthday Sex. Redeamable any time, anywhere, and any style.
It was only 12:11 and I needed to make a Pepto Latte and call it a night, I don't remember that being part of my new years resolution.
Don't do anything you wouldn't want to explain to paramedics
But that's half the fun of it
Im down. Even tho your nick name intimidates my vagina.
It was the textbook our-balls-touched-while-engaged-in-a-threesome-with-our-bosses-wife conversation.
It amazes and alarms me I'm not shocked to read that.
God I hope my hair dresser doesn't realize that all these hairspiration pictures are from gay porn blogs on tumblr.
Ok now a guy in a winnie the pooh costume is grinding on some chick to the song shots
You might call them booze related cuts, I call it "partying so hard you sweat blood"
His hands kept asking for sex, but all I could think was "dude, this is going to ruin my high".
It's always nice when a total stranger hates your ex just as much as you think they should.
I've got your keys and your panties. You can have one back. Your play honeybuns.
I know it's wrong but I'm human. Now get over here, tie me up, feed me pizza and Fuck the crazy out of me. Please.
Our relationship revolved around Taylor Swift albums. It's no wonder it ended so fast
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