Not hooking up w him- he has one of those L.L. Bean book bags w his initials on it
I wish they made portable blow up dolls for girls.
It's called a dildo, genius. Go to sleep.
did you hook up at the wedding?
No but I jerked off on the hotel sheets. I wanted to get my moneys worth.
stranger just walked up to the fridge at the party, took the hawaiin punch out, drank it straight from the bottle, looked at everyone who stared in awe and said "im fucking thirsty" and put it back.
I woke up naked in my own vomit. Not even in my bed. No one is happy.
She's more than welcome to come too, so long as she has gotten over that me being responsible for the death of her cat thing.
Found out that it IS actually possible to get road head from somebody in the back seat
To put it in a frame of reference with which you're familiar, it was like making out with a golden retriever.
I remember it because it was right after the sadness and right before the sluttiness. The calm before the storm if you will
I actually just took 17 pictures of some guy at the gas station that needs to marry me now
Blacking out is all I've done this year and we're only 3 days in. Checkmate bitch.
We exchanged spring break stories last night. Open relationships are the best.
Um, when I went down on you it got stuck there. Still had gum in my mouth. Didn't exactly have use of my hands to assist
she passed out standing next to the car. her head hit the door so hard the alarm went off. she instantly snapped out of it and started sprinting away
I was singing Colors of the Wind and swigging vodka and still felt like more of an adult.
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