This guy sitting next to me just bought a plot of land off the internet. On a whim. In the middle of class
oh fat girl friday strikes again...
The worse part is i sent a text at like three that said i was getting head... Now i have no idea who's mouth has been on my dick
i was calling myself "cat the lion" and tried eating the computer mouse because i thought it was "my prey"
He moved away. I mourned his dick all of Sunday. I feel a little better now.
I admit it's going to be hard to top a limo orgy and Mcnuggets....but I have faith in you
she keeps giving me cups of everbeer.. its everclear and beer mixed. i guess its blackout or backout time
Being drunk at the hospital is better than i expected. I got to hide and play in the little kids waiting area. Btw no one is hurt
Your lack of a response has proven you've clearly forgotten how crazy I am.
I ate an entire popcorn ball before bed. I know that because there is popcorn stuck to my poncho. Also. I'm still drunk. Also. I made out with a 19 year old. Also. #barnparties
Are there any rules against fucking the hot TA?
Maybe for her....
Her problem, not mine
He literally took a shit in my bathroom and then broke up with me.
Napping in front of family members can be embarrassing when you get a christmas boner in your sleep
I'm sorry. I slept with him again. On the plus side he's got better at it!
His sex game is strong it’s like a warlord’s dick! you know what I mean?
Nope
Randomize
