U dropped me off n it hit me, i made it inside for exactly shit thirty on the nose, another minute n i would of had brown trowsers
ugh, i have officially sinned in all of my cute clothes. i can't even wear any of them without feeling regret.
Immaculate conception is definitely the most boring way to conceive a child.
we found him in the shower with a bottle of jose saying "this is Mexico's fault"
all i asked was if it was all the way in, and now im laying here alone. sensitive guys fucking suck
there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
I've been meaning to ask you. The first night in the city did we do key bumps with a suicidal homeless man? My memory is fuzzy
I got to masturbate in Rome in a gorgeous hotel room. Don't try and tell me I need a boyfriend
Last night I woke up and the national rep of his frat was sucking my toe.
You just get me....like our souls are boning in the spirit world
Is there some sort of line being crossed when your shower activities start to involve jimmy johns?
Nothing makes the walk of shame as great as disapproval from a mom getting ready for work
Your friends are scaring the cats so I'm going to smoke weed with them to call them down.
And then before we had sex he was quoting space jam to me
I use my feet as sexual weapons
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