finally nailed that neighbor chick. hopefully i can get her wireless password now. free internet trumps moral standards any day
Today's face brought to you by last night's make-up.
My boobs grew. They knew we were going to vegas.
the amount of times i have wished for a boxed wine emoticon is almost alarming. almosttt
I honestly didn't see the problem playing beer pong In the car on the road trip home.
I'd like to thank you fucktards for dumping the WHOLE box of Tricuits in my bed after I passed out.
Out of all the people in the house to show their tits at mcdonalds to try and get free food, they picked those two?
I CRIED after phone sex. Am I gay?
just used my amazon order history to figure out my anniversary. I am the most epic/shittiest bf ever...
That's just weird. That doesn't make sense sexually at all. I mean, you might as well tape a pen to the tip and try and write your name while you're at it.
Oh god I want to come home! They have an air raid siren here that alerts their neighbours across the desert it's time to come over on atvs and drink.
DOMA is dead. I'm definitely going to be the last of our friends to get married now.
Bourbon is too strong for my cat, he does not want to drink it
I think my FWB just broke up with me and i don't know how I feel about that
I can appreciate that you picked up the hot drummer, but don’t have sex in front of my house lmao
Randomize
