I Bought a bracelet with bible characters and a charm broke. the virgin mary one. Do you think it's a sign?
When I woke up his cat was sleeping on my face and i had scratch marks on my neck. not happy.
only room for one pussy in that bed.
can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
it's like a replay of two fridays ago...except not in a motel and i'm not having sex in the shower.
He doesn't have any game.. I mean, his one move is forwarding chicks pictures of his penis.
No just sleep deprived. James woke me up at 7 and forced me to eat a hot pocket with him cause he " didn't want me to die".
"So you think you can dance" turned into "so you think you can run and slide across the bar"...Jack Daniels wins
I specialize in how to hang out and party with randoms after you've hooked up with them. Not in feelings.
The first thing we did this morning was see if we could see her barf in the prking lot from the roof. We could. It was in 5 spaces.
I wanted lighthearted conversation about ordering bulk condoms and anal lube but he's depressed and talking about god hating him, ugh
He got too drunk... he threw up ON the closed toilet.
It's a Jersey thing
This German chick looked me up and down for a while. Then she grabbed my crotch, let go after a few seconds, and said "you vill do". I think I'm gonna like tonight.
New low: eating a buttered roll while taking a shit.
This is why we're soulmates.
The cat just brought me a bottle opener. I think she's my soulmate.
I'd ask how but then you'd tell me.
im on a boat
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