in the practice room. just found 3 bottles of smirnoff hidden inside the piano. SO glad i didn't get into berklee...
she's into porn, im staying here tonight
And i didn't ask you to do that, You showed your penis at your own free will.
She's echoing.. Her head must be in the toilet..
My absolute favorite part of last night was after I puked in the ally, we rounded the corner and you screamed, "she's ok!" and everyone cheered
since you saved your number in my phone as "the hot chick you met last Friday" I don't know who you are either
Don't lose. A little bit of my soul dies every time a beer pong game is lost.
Just gave a blow job while wearing a shirt that says 'world's coolest mom' idk how my conscience feels...
If it makes you feel any better... I have a friend who found out her mom was in the video for 2 Live Crew's "Pop That Pussy"
Thanks for the bagel and the sex.
there is a smiley face on my leg painted in blood
I'm pretty sure that's yours.
My credit card got frozen due to suspicious activity. "Let's go over your recent transaction history... it looks like these are all at bars." BITCH, DON'T JUDGE MY MONDAY NIGHTS.
Why is there cereal literally EVERYWHERE?
It didn't follow directions.
i saved a drunk oompa loompa he was passed out on the lawn and i picked him up figured out where he lived and put him in his bed and wrote his roommate a note
I'm reading fall out boy fanfic. What has my life come to.
Randomize
