Today at work while talking to my co-worker we both realized at the same time that last year I had a one night stand with his roommate and he was in the living room drinking coffee when I did the walk of shame. YAY.
I just wanted to say sorry for trying to jack off your dog last night.
I just watched a girl use a tall boy Coors as a rolling pin to make christmas cookies
Don't EVER smell your tampon
you flashed the cab driver so we didn't have to pay the fare and then you decided you were on a roll so you flashed the guy at the maccas drive through... safe to say your boob job was the best idea ever!!
He tried to say the picture wasn't him. Like I'd forget his curved boner.
Fuck him for salsa, please. I heard its a good recipe.
why does he always try to puke into shot glasses
And I don't know what it is about weed making me want every episode of the real housewives of everywhere
My drug dealer just asked me to go see Les Mis on Christmas. Should I be worried this is some type of musical set-up?
Wait, tell the rest at happy hour. I wanna be able to interrupt you with my loud cackles and stupid questions.
We discussed how many times we've passed out during sex. The answers may shock you.
Let's not share with anyone else in the apartment of how we simultaneously peed in the kitchen sink last night.....
We havent had power for three days. What else is there to do besides drink and fuck? I thought that was obvious.
so i find a box of condoms inside my car with turn by turn directions to her bedroom... kinda freaked out cause she got my address and somehow inside my car
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