I stuck it in and pulled it out
Did she like it?
She giggled?
She liked it
who loves string cheese????? I LOVE STRING CHEESE!!!
you know...if you didn't give such great head little things like this would ruin our friends with benefits relationship.
Woke up at 4:30am to my little brother shaking me. Apparently I fell asleep naked on my kitchen table waiting for the toaster to pop. 2 years of college completed and i still havent learned my drinking limit...
My sister got her picture in the pub crawl section of the paper today and my dad said to me "why can't you be more like her?"
There's always one sober annoying person at a party. I hate responsible people. I just wanted to show everyone my nipples. There cute. She didn't have to stop me
He's trying to impress me with how much money he makes. How does he know me so well?
The assistant vp has a bottle of wine on his desk & I have a feeling my boobs will be making an appearance today.
It'll just be like "PENIS HERE". In case you get lost.
I'm gonna let my dick speak for itself from now on. Seriously, it's always recruiting for me even after 6 hours of drinking.
I think it's awesome that you're getting shower sex advice from a Mormon.
Glad to know I rate above a cabbage on the parenting scale.
I'm spending my Sunday wishing the entire Patriots offense would let me touch their manhood
Sorry my phone died because I decided charging my vibrator was way more important
I walk into the pharmacy and I'm like "I need three morning after pills" and the guy was like "uhhhh". All I said was "we didn't plan it, we all just got laid the same night"
I'm sorry but it's something you and your A cups wouldn't understand.
Randomize
