im sorry i didnt take advantage of you..iwaned to
i wanted you to too
my mom asked me how i could steal on a clear conscious and i told her it was because when i was younger she let me watch alladin and he did it.
your suggestions for charades were, getting sucked into an aircraft turbine, getting raped by a dolphin, and having sex with a vacuum cleaner. you got your own, and actually used a vacuum cleaner as a prop.
You need to find a way to go down on me and lick my toes at the same time
I'll google it
I'm hoping you can explain why I woke up with what I believe is pumpkin pie all over my body
Sorry the STD update turned into an attempt at a bootycall, but at least we both know we're clean now
Can I please come dance in my bra to destiny's child with you? I'll bring the wine and the glitter
I'm so fucking horny right now If I blink I might cum
I have no idea how but i got a hold of a blue food dye packet. And proceeded to rub it all over my tits. So yeah i'd say its safe to say i'll be known as smurfette for a while
Pulled a muscle in my back masturbating. But still listed as probable.
You are in a fancy European city. The best way to truly experience the city is through Tinder
If my emotions are below a 3 or above a 7, I'm crying
I'm like a saiyan, every time I get trashed I come back stronger
He's just been a dick since he set his face on fire. I just wanted to eat a fucking hot dog.
aloe plants are like gummy bears with an exoskeleton, but with healing powers instead of deliciousness.
are you on the drugs???
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