I love how you send me nude pics of girls you're fucking and name them by which city they're in instead of their name. "This is Nashville, this is Tupelo, this is Jackson..."
do you think my med school application would be worse off if "I like helping others and shit" slipped into an essay I emailed last night?
that's what penises do
they tell lies.
I keep having to talk dad out of putting tequila in the milkshakes.
He's like a perfect storm of amazing hair and horrible judgment.
Maybe you shouldn't go to cosmic bowling, i don't know if cum glows and I don't wanna find out i'm sure his parents don't either.
I thought it was a myth but I have just reached the age of sitting on my balls. Not a fan.
And don't try to lose a condom in me tonight. My vagina is not a storage compartment where you can just leave something and try and use it again later in the week.
I really couldn't care less what she looks like. That's why The Lord Our God gave us doggy-style.
I was watching porn and wanted to change the tab to another video to cum but I clicked the wrong tab and it was a gif of a dog but I was coming and couldn't do anything so did I jill off to a dog? I feel like I should be guilty
I straight up told your dad I've slept with a majority of your family
Drunk sperm are not productive sperm.
But I only have 2 emotions angry and horny
Have u seen my vagina and my gorilla costume? Im in need of it.
Never in my life did I expect to see Eric's mom in a cheerleader outfit along with other women
Randomize
