hey can you give me head? jesse told me that you're really good
who is this?
jesse's little brother
I just ate an adderall and jelly sandwich in front of my mom. Homework time!
Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
i just made a "things you cannot forget to do this week just because you're high" list.
He spanked me with a plate. I'm not sure where this is going...
I'm so proud of your ability to turn my Charlie horse last night into anal sex.
Stayed out til 7 am.... Did u know there's a guy who goes up and down the quad at that hour playing bagpipes?
Drinking franzia alone at noon watching a cheese themed episode of "The Chew" I'm ready to admit I need a job.
Oh my God, that is a gorgeous man. And I wasn't even gay until five minutes ago.
I thi k this dude I fcken showed up to the bar in a raisins shirts. I thought I was better than that. Fuckkkk.
It was great. They teamed up to hit on these two frat boys all night, until the frat boys started making out with each other. The looks on their faces...
I puked and rallied in front of a cop...and then waved at him....
I wish I knew the extent of my injuries before I climbed over the fence. Might have avoided the need to purchase a cupholder for my wheelchair.
Idk I'm drinking Sam Adams and wearing new balances so I'm basically a dad
i showed up really high and was trying to not be,so in order to not seem high, i got plastered
Randomize
