Without porn, I would have few hobbies.
well, atleast the road to alcoholism is fun.
Someone left a shot of disaronno in a champagne glass here this morning... flip a coin?
Just facebooked the guy whose name you're yelling in there. So you're aware, his interests include "swearing at babies" and "Ice luge"
He told me his mother taught him that move. What the hell do I say to that?
I'm standing outside of the bar watching homeless men teach a kid how to pee of the sidewalk.
There's a really old guy here with a really young girl. I'm guessing he has to make choo choo train noises to get his dick in her mouth.
Someone is in my phone as "fireball girl" and keeps texting me. How do I go about finding out who it is?
And my only real exposure to Russian culture is you and Internet porn.
Doap. Just bring some lube and a slingshot. Not sure y we need the slingshot.
While he was gone for spring break I took his head board... I don't wanna wake up from his shenanigans for the rest of my college career.
Dude your life.. At your sugar daddies house sending nudes to your fwb
I'm still, like... really stoked about not having any STDs
This bird just went for my eyes. Does he think I'm dead???
drunk me always erases text conversations because she is a woman of mystery and does not like for me to know what's going on in her life
Randomize
