she just made a shot glass out of magazine paper. I love her.
id like to know how you successfully locked me in your backseat last night
That's ok. Our relationship has a solid foundation of booze and questionable behavior.
That white girl was surprised to see orange pubes around my black cock. Happy Halloween!
I didn't just get this from the chlamydia fairy.. You should probably get tested.
We left his house because I forgot how to drink water, I was just holding it in my mouth and then spitting it out, needless to say I don't remember the sex.
Nothing ends a night of heavy drinking better than banging to three six mafia in your own driveway
Ran out of plates, so I'm using my sociology notes. Looks like they will finally have a practical use.
It was a fight. Me vs nature and drunkenness. And nature won. Big time.
just woke up on a lounge chair wearing a durag and holding burrito wrappers in my hands
The other night he asked if I had a condom and I said I had an IUD. and he goes OMG A BOMB?
He got you flowers. How bad can the sex really be?
She flashed us last time and pissed all over the floor this time. I'm scared to invite her back.
All I remember is an overwhelming desire for chicken nuggets...
Yes, you pinned my brother to the floor by the throat and threatened to slaughter his family if he didn't drive to mcdonalds and get you some.
Still riding the magical train of drugs so, yeah, Id say I feel great
Randomize
