I hope mine doesn't look like that
I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
I spent all day at the mall with her, then she made me actually watch a walk to remember then decided to tell me she was on her period. This one is either really crafty or I am really desperate.
I love having a vagina, its like having the keys to a city
How did it go last night?
Woke up head half shaved and a burrito? So good and bad?
There's a drag queen here that reminds me strongly of you. You should try crossdressing.
He was supposed to visit me tonight but he decided to stop in Tacoma so now I'm sitting on my bed naked eating oranges and candy corn while I watch Parks and Rec.
Now I have to hook up with him tomorrow DURING THE DAY.
I found them. Thank God. Now I'm gonna have to take a Xanax for the panic attack I almost had trying to find my Xanax.
ok so i got home drunk and was cleaning my kitchen and i was shaking out the throw rug and dropped it out the window, i'm sorry
He played me Kanye.. Speaking my love language.. He got a well deserved BJ
I'm sorry I lead life with my vagina.
apparently I kept repeating I have a to do list this summer and he's on it
Bold words for someone NOT on a unicycle
I just licked honey off my own tit. Is there anything about that which doesn't SCREAM single???
Trying to figure out these fractions. I bought 5 fifths of gin last week. Does that mean I have one whole gin? 5/5 = 1, right? You're having to homeschool your kids right now--so ask them.
Randomize
