you googled "nude photos of celebrities you wouldn't expect to have nude photos", puked into the beer bong, and then laughed
i've decided to use this saturday afternoon to take care of my pube situation
Going abroad, it was like my vagina was in a candy store... a sweet sweet british candy store
We've been broken up for 7 months. His mom sent me a card with a brochure inside titled "How at Risk for STD's are you?"
At the gym and this really hot trainer checked me out and was talking to his buddy about his workout. He then says "yeah man, like I'm doing so many reps- what's 7 times 7, 45?"
He was THIS close.
She showed me her tits and my first thought was "I want these to feed my future children." I'm scared.
I just read "to infinity and beyond" as "to infidelity and beyond" something is seriously wrong with my psyche
Perfect. And my grandma just called me and talked to me for eighteen minutes telling me that she was worried because of my Halloween costume that I'm not a Christian and that I'm not eating. Wtf.
Is "when in doubt date the guy with the bigger dick" a good philosophy?
nope. just stoned. wishing i had a golf cart.
I'd probably lick every tooth in Carly Rae Jepson's fucking mouth.
Teen Choice Awards are on if your wondering.
We're going to brunch on Super Bowl Sunday. I am not a smart man.
Don't worry you weren't as drunk as you thought. You only fell 4 times.
He in a way got kinda cockblocked by Jesus
I can see. My condolences to your vagina.
Randomize
