i wonder what megan fox's vagina feels like.
Heaven soaked bacon.
His text read: Sex? I replied: Not drunk enough. He bought 4 more rounds and tantalized me with the offer pizza later. This could be the beginning of a beautiful relationship.
So when you said you wanted to make a clay replica of my boobs and hang it above your bed you actually meant it?
Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described
So drunk. Washed my hair un pancheros sink cus I was so hot.
New high score, I made the stripper choke me while I was getting a lap dance last night
I'm gonna have sex with my clothes on and I'll know everyone there so I'll be in my comfort zone
Oh no, we smoked the revival weed. It came in a Batman bag. It hit like justice. And orphans.
Yeah, it was all very half-hearted. In the middle of sex we both just stopped and looked at each other and said, "can we just sleep instead?"
That is so sad.
It's okay I didn't send any nudes tonight so we are safe *inserts photo of a baseball umpire doing the safe signal*
Ya apperently its not "appropriate" to fuck in the school auditorium
just saw those girls we met the other night. i happen to be wearing a bunny suit and driving your smart car. i think its safe to say thats a no go situation.
Can we start referring to attractive men as "A fine piece of dick?"
Nate is still in lock up because when the cop informed me he'd shit his pants in the squad car I declined to post bail.
Everytime after he came, he'd laugh uncontrolably for ten mintutes. He was sober..
Randomize
