I would fuck her until my dick fell off. then i would fuck her with your dick.
sometimes i look at this picture of your cock before i go to sleep, there's something comforting about it
On the way home from Florida I threw up at the beginning border and ending border of 6 states. You win this year Spring Break.
I'm going as Jenn Sterger if she answered Favre's calls and ended up in a trash can. If I don't get laid tonight I'm going to be pissed
It's ok I'm watering my plants with a 40 in my camelback, people are staring
Come my child we shall walk thru the pasture of amazing sex and corndogs. Hint:some corndogs are not corndogs.
I'm gonna let my dick speak for itself from now on. Seriously, it's always recruiting for me even after 6 hours of drinking.
I'm reffing a fight in Fight Club I don't even know what I'm doing
She just pored wine down the turkeys hole and said that she christened it like the whore that it is...happy thanksgiving.
Can you plz delete the video of me twerking in Waffle House, my mom just got a vine.
So I just had breakfast and then sex in a parking garage before he went to school and thus I am loving my life
I woke up with a cutting board and a bag of uncooked pasta next to me.
So i had a lucid dream about blowing myself. This is why people love me
Why am I a human magnet for the worst dicks of the world?
If I say I hate myself for it does it make it any better?
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