im probably the most hungover person watchin icarly right now
I started the year with 2,800 dollars and am now down to 83 dollars-one of which i use to snort my focalin. I have given up on food and am perplexed as to how I can make 82 dollars last more than two weekends for booze
it's circumsized.
I think this conversation is over.
my mom said i couldn't bring cigarettes cause it was a family trip, which was really irresponsible of her because now i have to walk around the beach drunk trying to find someone with cigarettes.
She looked at my facebook and decided to bump the security deposit up an extra 250...now we have to destroy the house, its expected and I wouldn't want to disappoint
Please tell me why 'cock-a-thon' was auto saved in my phone.
Its like a zucchini between his legs. An orgasmic zucchini.
Every time I stand up, gravity punches me in the tits. This is horrible.
I also just told a guy I was available for counseling in case he needed to 'bang' things out. I've become a monster.
Dang. We need a girls trip ASAP. Preferably in a country who has even lower standards than us on a Friday night.
Yeah, but he has adorable dimples and dimples talk me into things.
I woke up to a quacking alarm clock and a rando in my bed. I told him I liked his cargo shorts. Fireball is not my soulmate anymore.
We don't know where he is but he left his pants and what appears to be a tooth here so he's gotta come back sometime
U just kept yelling her vagina wasn't a priority bc u had a bowl of cheerios calling your name
I love friends. Friendship is wonderful. I wish the rain was my friend
Randomize
