Okay, I have a threesome with foreigners and suddenly I'm a man-whore
Ridin mah bike see you on the moon
everyone knows he gets back in a week and after that i'm not sleeping around anymore. it's like i have a expiration date.
i feel like my life is a cheap remake of American Pie
pretty sure i saw you masturbating on chatroulette a minute ago. yes, i can recognize your cock
I THOUGHT I SAW YOU
just once i'd like the "right thing" and the "topless thing" to be the SAME THING
He was about to puke, and so I handed him an empty beer can. In retrospect, not very helpful.
You were walking around with a baby carrier pretending your vodka was a baby. You tried to get pictures on santas lap
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
Happy cinco de mayo!! Puke filled sombrero in the lawn needs to be picked up and whos never punched my fence boards in half needs to replace those by the way the owner of those panties (see attached photo) anytime you wanna cum over;-) hiii!
can we for just one second remember that I played with a homeless man's rat at st marks?
If you get laid dressed as my dad that makes me extremely uncomfortable
I did cocaine with my cab driver all night. It was the best date.
learning about efficiency and effectiveness in an administration seminar. real world application: walking across the street to the pub on break to shotgun a beer.
She was blowing air into green onions and tying knots in them to make "balloons"
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