And then he asked me why the subtitles were in Arabic. The television was off.
New pre-game routine....wal-mart bathrooms...quality beers for free...hallelujah
we put the last xanax in the middle and played hungry hungry hippos to see whod get it
fair is fair
I didn't know people actually cried after sex.
His penis was definitely too big to be the type that wants commitment. Shit.
I'll send you the picture of you double fisting vodka bottles, grinding one guy and making out with another... Every girl wanted to be you.. You make me so proud!
I tried to lock you in the bathroom stall because you were too drunk. But you escaped from underneath, I gave up
I think we got naked. I can't remember but if you have "friends" written on your ass, then we did. Because I have "best" on mine.
That moment when you see yourself in a security camera feed and realize you forgot a bra. And pants.
Do you think if i wear this shirt with my bengals boxers this kid will fall out of love with me a little bit because that's what I was going for.
And then he said he wanted to "get really weird with me on my horse." I took that as he wants to fuck me while riding my horse. Could be a good time.
Cheers to being single today. There's an entire box of franzia with my name on it.
is it acceptable to cross the border for sex?
I got a gay guy to motorboat me. These tits could change the world, I'm telling you.
I'm noticing I drink less and do fewer lines when I do both together.
Now that's what I call smart money management.
Randomize
