Fun fact: tonight on intervention was the guy who did my tattoo
Sacagawea was the original milf.
So apparently when I was 2, I went around drinking everybody's beer at some wedding, then passed out in a corner....
This explains a lot.
Their house warming gift for us was a half case of keystone and getting the cops called..
Down at Ground Zero right now. So many people here. It's the most patriotic game of grabass Ive ever seen.
I was passed out in a dog food bowl tor two hours. Just tapped my dinner beer. I love homecoming.
If drawing me a picture of his dick in draw something is flirting then he is doing it wrong.
Ummmm you know you're drinking vodka out of a Skittles bag, right?
Guess who just got out of a ticket because the cop liked her costume? THIS GIRL.
Okay. How did someone manage to piss on TOP of a urinal? What giant is roaming around with a prick five feet from the ground?
I was originally going to go as fembot from Austin Powers
I wanted to have tiny guns for tits
I woke up with chocolate melted between my tits. I'd say that's a win for all parties involved.
I dont remember you getting a condom thrown at you. I think I had a concusion
last night I learned that if you try to buy tacos in this town, that you will be stopped by three cop cars with breathalizers
I enjoy the company of your penis
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