Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
He looks too sensitive, like he's going to write me a poem and cry after the first time we have sex.
People were stuck in the elevator screaming and freaking out. I banged on the door and yelled, "fire depart!" They got excited and then I ran away. lolz
Just got the orientation leader spot. For the first two days, I will be one of the best looking guys on campus. The freshman girls will be so disappointed they settled for me when everyone else comes back.
becoming an adult blows. i don't think its possible for me to wake up for anything that doesn't involve kegs and eggs or half naked bums passed out in our yard.
You were humming mission impossible as we ran from the cops
He's like Medusa, you can't look directly into his eyes or you'll turn into a slut.
Double vision is so hot when a big dick is in sight. Thank you Bud Light.
He said I could liberate his beef and all I could think about was how I don't eat veal for political reasons.
He texted his hospitalized grandma while inside me, so really a perfect gentleman.
I just need you to appreciate that this is the first time I've ever been cut off and it's at an airport bar in Philly before 1 o'clock in the afternoon.
Oh god. Charles just fell off the bar. Didn't spill his drink. He's come so far..
I got copblocked.
What?
Cockblocked. By a cop. Copblocked.
Anal on new furniture sounds like a quickest way to violate a warranty
screwing the intern at work sucks when u find out the boss is too. She is a smoking hot though
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