Waaait I'm alsleep in myt car somewhere
No one actually likes Tequila. They just accept it as a fact of life. Like hpv.
Moms kinda upset I threw up in grandmas bedroom. I think ill stay in tonight.
they lined up to high five me when i got taken out by the stretcher. The paramedic high fived them too
Drinking down Plan B with a 5 hour energy. Winding down welcome week in style.
We ended up sleeping in the emergency room for safety (you know, well lit, cameras..) and then an ambulance drove us to the train station around 4am. great last night in australia.
At least your night didn't end with three cops seeing your ass and you sitting on the ground in a wig throwing your shoes at people
HE'S LICKING FROSTING OFF OF THE EIGHTEEN YEAR OLD BOY
At the end of the night i was really thirsty and tied to a bedpost
I woke up with the gnarliest cold/hangover combo
Thats what u get when u have butt ass naked rooftop sex at night in december
Worth it.
I will pepper spray him so fast I don't even care
I heard a crunch while giving him head. I looked up and he was eating Cheese Itz. So we made a deal that he'd take a hand job so I could eat them too.
Need advice bro. Which one should I take: the blonde devil crying in the corner or the brunette crawling on the floor acting like a dinosaur??
Her cat was breathing in my ear all night, like that kid from Hey Arnold.
God yes pancakes and booze sounds like the best night ever.
Randomize
