this guy just used the pickup line "God must have spent a little more time on you" I recognized the nsync lyric immediately.
I am not deleting the internet history anymore, now I am going for shock value.
We totally just fucked in a closet. These vacations with his family are causing creativity I never thought I had.
i'm gonna need a rally to restore sobriety after this weekend...
Well he has that kind of carefree attitude that comes from a big penis
whatever buzz i had immediately ended when i saw her run through a sliding glass door
Nothing will ever prepare you for the moment when you are sitting on your friends bathroom floor with no pants on eating string cheese & pita at 2am.
Just witnessed my roommate pick her nose and eat it in her sleep. Remember, you made out with that.
I inadvertently smoked 6 blunts at one time. We just kept passing them around...I didn't know what happened until it was over. I can't walk.
I literally put my pussy on his sideburns, it was awkward
There's a lil minaj in everyone
I had to watch them play Salty Cracker. I have never seen a grown man cry with a boner before
U offered to motor boat her and it somehow turned into u two going on a sunset cruise in Newport. At 3am.
Do you want the fat one with an ok face or the skinny ugly one?
It doesn't matter as long as our shame is in tandem.
I was apparently the best non-Irish person at the party. I wore my skating dress, Austrian flag and a giant shamrock. Everyone is calling me "30 Shots Girl".
I don't want to inconvenience you with my dick\n\n
Randomize
