So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
My roommate got wasted last night and went to the 24 hour Bally's Total Fitness at 3 A.M. He got back took his shirt off, made a protein shake, puked, asked me if he was almost as jacked as Ronnie Coleman then called ME gay before I could say anything and went to bed
Having him eat chocolate out of you is not as romantic as it sounds. I'm still finding pieces.
So I told her I dislocated my shoulder and she said "well okay. I can either be on top or blow you."
Decisions, decisions.
she was handing out condoms w/ her number on them...
I can't even go pee because I'm making sure he doesn't run off somewhere naked.
Just realized Ive had sex in or around each thing listed in Green Eggs and Ham besides the fox.
New wedding record, my shirt was off by 8pm!!!
My professor laid down on the floor and told us a story that involved being naked covered in Vaseline with a pumpkin on your head. No lie. This is going to be a great semester.
STOP WHATEVER YOU ARE DOING AND GO OUTSIDE RIGHT NOW. THE MOON LOOKS LIKE CATWOMAN
Definitely broke my toe and messed up my knee walking back. Drink hitch hiking should never happen again.
Was it you I was with where I saw a guy open a beer with his butt?
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
Its mothers day... Can my present be an orgasm...for once?
Could’ve gone my whole life not seeing a man snort coke off another man’s cock... but there it is...
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