needless to say, I hope she has to get an abortion again
turns out they were just sand fleas, not crabs.. thank you random mexican girl from padre who's name i can't pronounce
I just filled out my 2010 Census drunkenly. I'm single handedly throwing it off.
I am the poster child for what not to do during sex. Soon they will be calling an undesired position after me
All four of us managed to throw up in the same bathroom at different times during the night. I think we'll get along great living together.
It's amazing how much better one feels once you put something in your vagina.
We had to leave after he was in the middle of the street yelling "Balls of Steeeeeeeeel!!"
When he texted me, I got a little wet. Until he asked me to get Jimmy Johns before I got to his house.
Just watched my entire extended family eat salad out of the bowl i threw up in last night.
Apparently drinking in your car before going into a sales meeting is frowned upon. We are car sales men not doctors.
It's nice out. . But after I almost put a bag of chips in the microwave to make nachos. ..I figured it best to not venture too far from the couch
It all started with sending him a text about Spongebob. It escalated from there.
Maybe you can just make seal noises during sex and we can call it good
Let's be honest, college orientation is going to be "here's how to drink everclear"
The closest thing I've had to an orgasm lately is sneezing nonstop from fucking allergies.
Randomize
