You're in luck. The brownies don't even have butter, just vege oil
What can I expect? While all of my friends are getting married, all of his friends are tripping on robitussin
i'm in his phone as sushi coochie
She thought someone was breaking in but when I said it was me she got even angrier and threw a coffee mug at my head.
The prescription for my birth control just blew away in the wind on my way back from the health center. It's like god wants me to get pregnant
Is it penis luge time yet?
I tried to tell her I've only slept with 3 other people...she then named off 5 of her sorority sisters I fucked and asked me if she should continue
he fell down during beer pong and the chick told him to rub the sand out of his pussy and suck it up. i am in love
I've carried my liver for over 24 years. If it can't carry me for the next 24 hours than it deserves to be damaged.
WHAT DID YOU SAW VERBATIM. VERBATIM IS SOBER FOR WORD FOR WORD
One good thing about being really drunk when you go out to dinner is that the leftovers are a surprise. These quesadillas had shrimp in them! Who knew?
I think the sex rug burn on my back is infected, can you check it out when you get home?
I'm starting to think my emotional health is declining because I was watching transformers today and legit almost started crying
We celebrated Cinco the right way. We took shots of 1800 then he fucked me while Selena was on TV in the background
I just volunteered myself to get tazed this should get interesting
Randomize
