there's something wrong with the internet when a search for "barney the dinosaur violence" comes up with nothing
just found preset five on the shower head...pretty sure my pussy just had a panic attack
i literally in my bathroom watching tv from across the hall while trying not to fall asleep with my dog keeping my feet warm. wednesday's shouldnt be like this
Tonight is one of those "I'm wearing a shirt as a dress" nights because I need to get laid.
I got lit on fire and andy went to jail last night. Totally unrelated incidents though.
Party at my house. Beach themed. Clothing optional.
Wouldn't that make it "Nude Beach Themed?"
I just masturbated to a Jock Jams cd. What have you done today?
He spent $1100 at a strip club. If I had that kind of disposable income, I'd make a cocaine sandcastle.
So what do normal people wear to parties? Normal meaning not you.
You wear an inflatable farm animal to TWO THEMED PARTIES and I never get to hear the end of it...
do you want me to tag you in the pics from the party?
Hmm. Use your judgment. Bootlicking pics are probably not ok. Otherwise fine.
She brought over her portable harddrive and we dueled with porn. This relationship is too beautiful to last.
We found him flat on his back, sobbing, 'fuck you stars' at the sky. No more everclear for Derek.
I feel like my vagina was just in a fistfight.
I NEED TO TAKE A FUCKING BREAK. MY VAGINA IS SMOKING.
i ate pretzels. i might be the first human to be hospitalized from pretzels. that's how bad this is.
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