I think my grandma died before she was convinced I was straight
we're getting ready to take strippers to breakfast. I love my life.
Anthony wouldn't know good sex if it sat on his face
when i was 16 reading the aftercare instructions at the piercing place i wondered why they would ever think to warn me about getting semen in my bellybutton
then i met college
dude she was so drunk she thought Jim Joyce made the right call
I AM OVULATING LIKE A STEAM ENGINE.
She was stumbling around looking for her cat. She said i could help, but i had to call him by his jungle name
At this point I will cuddle anything to prevent from dying alone
Somehow those two combined like captain planet and shit went haywire
Lets ignore the fact that you want to turn your dorm room into a sex dungeon and focus on the real issues here.
Side note, from now on any snap chat I get that isn't interesting enough... Is getting a dick in response. Judge your snaps accordingly
I don't want sex or anything I just really need someone to appreciate how shiny my hair is
She just called at a dance party, and you stopped mid puke to join. Another successful night.
Like you haven't hit rock bottom until you have had to throw your own turd out a window
now acid just makes me think of crab ragoon
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