awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
You told him your wedding ring was part of your costume. not okay!!
Dude I still wanna know who I had sex with on new years eve
But fine, we can play that game. You can come over and we can have totally platonic, long, boring discussions. Or we can fuck. Whatever.
One reason I feel like garbage: Kraft single wine shots
Me and the cabbie are stopping on the way at a sit down restaurant to eat. My life is so sad.
sex on the stairs. not our finest idea.
I need an adult. someone more adult than my current state
That shot was terrible
You were like one of those guys at carnivals that spit out fire..... Except it was throw up
Last night I said "I'm so glad you broke up with your lesbian soccer mom girlfriend" I don't remember how he reacted I just remember trying to pee in the woods
MY WHOLE FAMLY IS TALKING ABOUT MY BUTT
WAIT I'M COMING I WANT TO TALK ABOUT IT TOO
I woke up naked in her room. More precisely, I woke up naked in her room with her and her sister laughing at my penis. I hate my life.
I woke up missing my shoes and my left eyebrow. MY. EYEBROW.
I’ve lost count of how many disciplines of science this conversation about Harry Potter has gone through.
It's a race to see if I finish the bottle first or my homework
Randomize
