Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
Please stop bringing your one night stands to Sunday brunch.
her cat watched me eat her out... I would use the alternate term for both of those things but it's too weird.
He wouldnt stop screaming that he wanted a trashcan WITH a lid. Whats so necassary about a lid
i was staring at her drunk thinking "shes at least a four"
Did I actually say goodbye last night or did I just poison you with vodka and disappear?
You were crying because you hate wine coolers but you really wanted to prove you could finish it
I had sex with a Dutch boy on a rock last night. Happy graduation! x x
You can't play that off as role play thing. You held my hips and kept yelling "put a baby in me!" That shit ain't cool.
I FINALLY GET TO MASTURBATE. SO EXCITED.
she keeps a switchblade in her panty drawer... i am both terrified and slightly turned on
ALSO I MAYBE ACCIDENTALLY HAND CUFFED MYSELF TO A CHAIR
I just realized that with the new snapchat update / emoji sticker thing I can now use easily use emojis to cover my boobs in nudes.
Can you repeat that, but with context?
I can't wait to shower all this regret off of me
Randomize
