eric is really sick so I'm taking care of him! :(
just blow him with soup in your mouth.
I just put lube in Matt's bellybutton. He looks unhappy.
I was thinking about baking his mom "sorry you found out i was sleeping with your son" cupcakes
As it turns out, strippers don't accept checks.
I was born in the year of the cock... How fitting.
I appreciate the offer. Swallowing pride is much like swallowing cum, difficult and unpleasant
I was told to ask you about memoirs of a geisha.
My mouth holds just enough water for my bong
There is a literally infinite number of spliffs going around this table.
Delicious
I feel like I'm at a sushi bar with a spliff belt.
i'm totally cool with all the dick sucking you're doing down there, but as your brother i think i'm supposed to warn you our parents will be home in 5
I just hope when I turn 21, it doesn't tank my entire semester.
He was talking up his golf swing like other guys talk up their dick. Is this adult dating or just another flavour of douchery?
I'm facebook/twitter stalking the guy I just slept with as he's passed out next to me. What a time to be alive...
What am I thankful for..I figured out I can drink on antibiotics without getting sick thanks to the power of pot gummies
the fact that your 21st birthday is also new years eve is pretty much a death sentence
Randomize
