I just watched 2 blind guys walk into each other head on in providence. It pays to pregame in your car.
That bad?
Full length cargo pants, running shoes, and a partial unibrow. Alcohol really is blinding.
Just saw a woman with a Pomeranian in her bra. Way to step up your game Seattle.
I was still in a towel. We hadn't even started drinking yet and the champagne bottle dropped and exploded literally up into my vagina.
Nobody has ever asked me for my honest opinion on whether they needed anal bleaching before
you'll be horrified to know he's visiting next weekend
You two are a rollercoaster of sex and silence.
A horseman, i repeat, a man on a horse downtown just told me i was gorgeous and my friends were not. Not drunk enough.
Welcome to the south, dude. Gives the phrase "I wish you a dry ass" a new perspective.
Just out of curiosity. Did you wait until my fb picture was well liked by others before liking it so people won't know we're fucking?
Annnnd I didn't even notice there is a guy dancing in a jock strap beside me. That explains girls smiling at me
He just kept mumbling that he was too drunk for society and then he peed in a bush
You threw up on his face 22 hours ago and now he's here holding your hand. I think he likes you.
So the 25yr old smokeshow I fucked last night said "Prepare to be disappointed" as he put the condom on. I was. 40 is bullshit.
It was horribly awesome. Its like looking at the sun, you know its bad for you but I just couldn't stop looking.
Shame - the story of my life.
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