haha i took a picture of myself naked on her camera
She didnt have a camera...
I saw a girl walking around campus with bandages on both her knees. I need to get her number.
ive come to the point where weve hung out more times sober than drunk. i think im growing up. fuck.
It's been so long since i rode in a trunk. I'm riding in a trunk btw
We got back from Mcdonalds and literally 5 minutes of being in your room, you wanted to go back because "We haven't been yet."
He goes "sorry was at the gym. Some of us workout " and I wanted to text him back and go "well some of us do occasional drugs so we don't have to"
So it finally happened last night... I re-met someone that i've already had sex with. Had no idea who he was. Fantastic
I danced with this guy last night, I left like I was humped by a blind baby kangaroo trying to body-box.
I was just tryna bring you beer girl. I should've known you'd be shirtless though
Tuesday Boozeday turned into What-the-fuck-were-you-thinking Wednesday real fast.
She definitely peed in a bucket in their closet last night. We should warn them about that, right?
Personally, I'm gonna be Sexy Dobby the House Elf.
You either got a dog, or you have a boy over. I can't tell from the noises which it is.
Last night I had a dream that I changed my last name to Vodka. what does that say about my life?
i was sitting on the kitchen floor shaking my gallon of vodka at people and asking if they wanted to climb the heaven hill... getting dumped is the best thing that has ever happend to me
Randomize
