i would punch a child for taco bell
I wish facebook had a fuck off button.
So im at the gym and some guy has a tattoo of a hand doing the shocker... The douche bag bar has been raised yet again.
I passed out on my porch last night. I'm still making it to class. This is what growing up means.
He's crying and calling me out on using him. It's awful. And I'm too drunk to leave.
I would not wish his dick upon my worst enemy
The first clue should've been that he literally had shit in his hair. How does that even happen?
my vagina can't take this anxiety. there is no way he is 19 and this smooth. he's lying about his age or he's a goddamn sexual prodigy
I'd rather blow Nickelback than be told he gave me gonorrhea. I'd even post it on Facebook for all of the world to like, share, and judge me.
he's just got his life so together and it makes my pussy wet.
It's 4/20 and I spent the morning in the gym and am working later tonight. I don't even have any weed. Why am I adult-ing again?
Like I fucked him in the shower at 3 am when I had classes all day the next day so he can't say I'm not dedicated
Also I just took the BEST ass selfie of my adult life.... it's gonna be a good day haha
Girl behind me in line at CVS was getting impatient then outta nowhere blew up shouting that if she didn't get her plan B soon she might be a mom and that if we couldn't tell she'd be a horrible mom
Highlight of the day: got a bunch of drunks to sing baby shark.
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