how are pickles made is in the google history again... why do you always wonder that, and forget the answer?
oh ps. last night you kept telling me to calm down because everything was fine cause you were getting "arab money"...
side note. good thing you didn't come to drunk breakfast. we were judged by children.
he turned down sex AND sandwiches. who the hell does that?!
Im sorry for drunkenly throwing your phone into the ocean. At the time it seemed like a good way for you not to text him
Well apparently I decided it was easier I piss in the trash can at waffle house than In the toilet. Would've been ok if the trash can was in the bathroom.
i want to have awesome sex and feel fuzzy.
I went by my nickname in rehab. It made it feel more like summer camp.
he didn't stitch me up last time. in fact, he yelled at me for bleeding.
I need an inhaler full of pot for all of this breathless rage.
I never thought I'd have to apologize for tasting like absinthe and cheetos before tonight
We hooked up last night. I think it was great for our friendship.
Just reintroduced tequila back into my life...so that's happening
YAS SHES BACK AND BETTER THAN EVER
He plays guitar, sings like an angel, and acts like a gentleman. If I don't fuck him by the end of first semester, I'm dropping out
I don't want to sleep with any other woman but you but I want to try this whole mother daughter thing that would be nuts
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