party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
What are you drinking?
Shitty Coors light. OM NOM NOM TASTES LIKE HIGH SCHOOL
I'm seeing double. Its like being in a room full of people
all i know is that they all tuched my pee cup last night.
Sex tip #67: Jizz in the eye is very near the equivalent to pepper spray. Not recommended for pleasure enhancement.
Tonight's Real World episode reinforced the well-known fact that men of any caliber can hook up with girls named "Crystal"
please explain to me why there is a shopping cart in my living room.
You know summer is almost over when ur school booty calls start hitting u up as if solidifying their spot in drunken mistakes for next semester
I want to celebrate with you...
There's nothing I'd like more than a celebratory "The guy I'm doing just found out he's not a baby daddy" dinner.
Did you eat 9 cans of raviolii last night?
Come on man nobody wants to admit that
Has anyone ever told you you're majestic like a sea turtle when you fuck?
And your cock privileges have been revoked.
I have accepted that I am a sexual predator. What I can't accept is the lack of sexual men for me to seduce in this town.
Yesterday you said I was the best.
No. I said you DID your best. There's a huge difference.
You've seen the quality of dick pics I normally get. The bar is high.
you tried to strip tease your way into canada but got arrested instead. don't worry, your mom doesn't know.
Randomize
