yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
i always forget guys have bellybuttons
Covered in glitter and dick. 2010 feels a lot like 2009.
Just woke up to my stoned boyfriend building a shrine around my bare ass. He'll never leave me.
He just came into the room wearing nothing but a Speed Racer helmet. I think he just invented a fetish.
So it looks like you may be an uncle real soon. Don't ask how I feel about it and don't text me back.
It Amazes me that I was able to drunk update my status in Spanish last night.
Have to get circumcised. Doctor goes, "On the bright side, you can tell people your dick is too wide."
Just realized Ive had sex in or around each thing listed in Green Eggs and Ham besides the fox.
Well it's official, last night I hooked up with the third girl from the apartment downstairs.
Dude that's a hat trick!
I know, I tossed my hat on the floor as I was walking out.
Riding the train home at 6 am for class still drunk is losing its novelty in my junior year
Idk how much vodka is on these pants but I'm gonna wear them anyway: the biopic
Why do I have this feeling like this is heading in a slightly threesome-y direction
i almost got into an argument defending my life choices with a guinea pig eating chocolate cake at 4am
From now on I'd like to be known as Rampage.
Randomize
