Sponge bath it is.
Yes but life is bad with poopy sheets
You never go ass to mouth. That's quite possibly the most important rule Paramedic school has taught me.
M WATCHING THE HISTORY CHANNEL AND IT SAID THAT WHEN THE LUST PART OF THE BRAIN IS ACTIVATED THE JUDGEMENT PART IS NOT. THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
Dude he's your dog he doesn't love me more than you. I'm just like that cool uncle that takes him to burger king and to see girls.
Whoever was the last to get in from the chinese firedrill had to pay the dealer.
The stripper was waving you to the stage, not up on the stage. That's why you got choked out.
she stopped traffic so I could crutch across the street. Clubbing while crippled and drunk is different.
So instead of asking me for my number, he asked for my dad's because he wanted to "thank the man that helped create those tits."
Need to spend sober time with him while fully clothed. I can't decide if he's a seriously amazing man or a complete fucking dickbag.
This is me not judging you for what a fine line you draw between the two.
I'm going to fake an anxiety attack to get to the front of the line. Save me some brisket.
I’m almost positive this girl is drinking a mojito in class right now, if so she’s my new hero
I'm by the tree and the Dora the explorer balloon .. Look for the Dora the explorer balloon
...I just added shower water to my vodka on ice\n#sendhelp
We found you with your penis in the vacum hose crying softly...
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